Lonely? Independent? Allow me to transform your paradigm!
Every single one of us has a need to belong - to our significant other, to our friends and families, our culture, country, and world. It’s core to our existence and our happiness.
The opposite of belonging is loneliness. A lack of attachment leads to spiritual, psychological, and physical illness.
Researchers have found that belonging requires:
- Frequent, positive interactions with the same people.
- Engaging in these interactions within a framework of a caring, stable, long-term relationship.
Belonging goes beyond superficial friendships and even sex. It is the need for deep bonding that is crucial to our well-being.
It’s such a strong instinct that even highly intelligent people join cults, stay in abusive relationships, and go against their own intuition in order to belong.
Changing romantic partners can be seductive; but researchers say that it’s belonging found in loving, long-term relationships that is most important.
Belonging is required for romantic bliss. Studies now confirm that love must be mutual in order for it to be satisfying and for you to feel that sense of belonging.
In one study they compared people who received love without giving it and those who gave love but didn’t receive it back and they found that both groups described the relationship as unsatisfying.
No one belongs here more than you! Every attempt you’ve made in your life to belong has been for the right reasons. And if you don’t yet feel that sense of belonging, stick with it, and we will get you there! All of these videos, everything I do, for you, is to help get you there to that sense that you belong here! That you are connected, first and foremost, to yourself, to a Greater Force, and to your community.
Heather Hans, LCSW, MSW, MBA, CPIC, is a Visionary, Healer & Teacher, and the author of The Heart of Self-Love: How to Radiate with Confidence. It is Heather's firm belief that loving oneself is necessary to have fulfilling relationships and a successful life. Join Heather’s 30-Day confidence challenge at avanoo.com